Seated is an option

After attending many gigs throughout the years it's becoming more apparent that either I've become too old for them or the fans that I'm sharing the standing area with are too delicate for a occasional shove here and there. Nowadays it's become impossible to enjoy the moshing palava without a dramatic pre teens exclaiming how people shouldn't push and definitely shouldn't stand in front of them. Clearly they've never been to a gig before. 

For all those who are yet to experience a standing gig or recognise yourself to be the pathetic moron as described in the above paragraph, take note of what I'm about to advice you on: 

GIG ETIQUETTE 2.0 

1. If you want a barrier spot at the front, make sure you enjoy the support bands or we'll make your 2 hours wait for your 'future husbands' a misery 

2. If you're going to complain about people pushing please just leave. You're in the standing section... 300 people are trying to see the act on stage just like you. GO BUY A SEATED TICKET NEXT TIME. 

3. What are you doing with a bag... Seriously. Just no.  (Cloakrooms are available at most venues) 

4. If you have seriously long hair that you're going to flip off your neck when it gets hot inside, do us all a favour and tie it up nicely. I don't appreciate hair in my mouth nor hair in my eye. 

5. 'Omg why are people moshing this is so stupid' plz just leave. 

6. Leave your iPads at home

7. Flip flops and high heels are a no 

8. Personal space does not exist.